Monday, April 30, 2012

Time for something new

I've been feeling a bit slumpier the last few weeks, my joints and muscles have been a bit more achy and I've had more of that burning/tingling sensation in my extremities after exertion. I haven't been extra active and my CFS has never come in waves or been unpredictable like other peoples', so I'm guessing it's either the antibiotics (500 mg Zithromax for 2 weeks for Lyme) or the added stress at work. And if it's the antibiotics, it may or may not be mild herxing (worsening of symptoms from the Lyme bacteria dying off) from them, though it's hard to tell because I know antibiotics are hard on your system either way and can make you feel tired. Who knows.

On top of it all, I've stopped my twice a week of light yoga stretching because I tweaked my neck/upper spinal cord after the car accident a few months ago and it still hurts. So there's that. And I just got this diagnosis of interstitial cystitis (non-bacterial inflammation of the bladder) because of the very sharp pain in my bladder which is seriously annoying and very disruptive to my life!

Blah! But all this blah makes me want to DO something about it. Thankfully, I've mostly killed off that instinct to DO (physically) in the last year or so through sheer force of will and reconditioning, so it just splashes out into more research on how to feel better. I've found some potentially helpful supplements for Lyme and for the bladder, which I will post on later. And I have quasi-decided (it's a cop-out, not a real decision, sigh) that I should seriously start meditating and possibly even see a counselor for all my CFS sadness that I bottle up inside. I'm a pretty cheery person, but I know that it sits there just under the surface  because I will cry about it instantly if I think about it (which I avoid doing at all costs). Not very healthy I know, but it's how I deal. I should probably learn some new methods of dealing though...

So time for some serious newness...meditating and potentially counseling. We'll see if I'm brave enough to commit to either.

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